When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Randomize
