WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
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