After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Randomize
