so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize
