you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
