i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
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that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
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We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
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