At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Randomize