ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
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does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
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Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
Randomize