Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
Do vagina's smell?
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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