That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
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