Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
Randomize
