Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
we're so committed to being not committed
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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