With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
Randomize
