I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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