your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
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