Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
