wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
A+ Viking dick
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
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