Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Randomize
