Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
Randomize
