I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
I wish you could order shots online.
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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