Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
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