My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Randomize