Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
Randomize
