can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
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