Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
