dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
i was just outside smoking and i saw a hooker sing "i wish i knew who your daddy was" to her new born baby. someone explain to me why i ever left chicago to go to college...
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
