There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize