those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
Randomize
