At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
