I just poured my flask into a drink. Then I realized the drink belonged to the guy next to me so I stole it from him. He confronted me and I made out with him to distract him. When I looked up, I realized his wife was watching. Its barely 10:00.
You smell like a Billy Joel song
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Randomize
