There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Randomize