We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
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