I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Randomize
