why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
Im just a social blackout drinker.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
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