So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
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