Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
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