wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
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