ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
i think my cat just said my name.
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Randomize
