Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
Randomize