im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
This couple is walking their pig around campus
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Randomize
