Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
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