im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
Randomize