I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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