Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick.
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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