We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Randomize