You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
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So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
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Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
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