is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Randomize