We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
I need to wash the frat house off of me
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize