Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
Randomize
