he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
Randomize
