Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
Randomize
