so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
