He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
